Washington

I, Anonymous: Pissed Pedestrian

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Dear Seattle Drivers,

Fuck off. Seattle is the only city I’ve lived in where I’ve nearly been hit by a vehicle multiple times as a pedestrian. How many pedestrians have to die in this city for drivers to wake the fuck up, NOT immediately turn on a red light, and pay fucking attention to a goddamn crosswalk sign?!

And you assholes that I stare down every time you nearly run me over, I truly despise you. You either don’t make eye contact, or you wave for me to keep walking like you’re a fucking crossing guard shepherding me to safety.

I hope car registration fees rise astronomically in this city, not because I think it’ll stop you shitty drivers, but because it’s music to my ears when you fucks complain about it.


Do you need to get something off your chest? Submit an I, Anonymous and we’ll illustrate it! Send your unsigned rant, love letter, confession, or accusation to [email protected]. Please remember to change the names of the innocent and the guilty.



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