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Tottenham v Burnley: Premier League – live!

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67 min “The handball rules need changing … urgently, given their often game-changing and absurd application,” says Geoff. “Unlikely, of course, given that rule-making is in the hands of old-fart bureaucrats, rather than the players to whom the game ultimately belongs.”

I couldn’t disagree less, though I feel bad about dissing my old-fart brethren.

65 min: Great save from Pope! That was a lovely move from Spurs. Son found Kane, who smoothly played in the overlapping Sessegnon. He picked out Son, whose close-range shot was saved instinctively to his right by Pope. That was a brilliant stop.

64 min Son’s outswinging corner is headed across goal by Bentancur, just like on Thursday night, but this time Pope is able to fall on the ball.

62 min: Barnes hits the post! That would have been a sensational equaliser. The impressive Collins played a superb pass through the lines to find McNeil, who stabbed an equally good ball towards Barnes. He turned and unleashed a shot from 25 yards that beat the flying Lloris and thumped off the post.

60 min Burnley aren’t out of this. They look dangerous, certainly from set-pieces, and Spurs won’t be comfortable until they get a second goal. If they don’t win today, fourth place has almost certainly gone.

57 min Spurs break four on three. Sessegnon and Son combine to tee up Kane, who whips over from the edge of the D.

56 min Spurs appeal for handball when Kane’s shot is blocked by Taylor. No dice, soldier. It hit Taylor’s elbow, but it was tight to his body.

55 min Here’s the Premier League table as things stand. Leeds and Everton play today, Arsenal tomorrow.

53 min There’s some burgeoning needle in this game. Cork leaves one on Hojbjerg and is pushed by Bentancur; then Dier has an exchange of view with the Burnley bench. You hate to see it.

51 min “Last penalty had various conspiracy theories,” says Yash Gupta. “This one must be freaking out all those keyboard conspiracy warriors who will be saying everyone is against Arsenal.”

That’s a six-month MBM suspension for you mate.

50 min McNeil swings the resulting free-kick to the far post, where Collins gets over. He was up so early, above Davinson Sanchez, but couldn’t get over the top of the ball.

49 min Lucas Moura is booked for tripping Charlie Taylor, though I’m not sure it was deliberate. Even so, this has been a strong start to the second half from Burnley.

48 min: Chance for Burnley! Brownhill’s free-kick from the right is headed just wide by Long, who did well to leap above Dier, stiffen his neck muscles and guide a downward header in the general direction of the Spurs goal. Lloris might have it covered, though I wouldn’t bet the farm on it.

47 min “That ‘arms in an unnatural position’ things gets me a little,” says Bill Hargreaves. “Were they orbiting the earth? Still attached to his body? Deliberately positioned to interfere? ‘Spursy’ is beginning to associate itself with penalties, I feel. Would love to see a stat on that. Anyway, I’m probably biased.”

I don’t really like the law, but it is clear enough. I thought it was a penalty on Thursday night as well. It was soft but not Andrex-soft, more Tesco Everyday Value-soft

46 min Peep peep! Spurs begin the second half.

“It’s so great that VAR identifies fouls which no one saw in real time,” says Robert Speed. “Just what everyone was clamouring for.”

Let’s have a song for VAR.

Half-time reading

Half time: Tottenham Hotspur 1-0 Burnley

A perfect end to a difficult half for Spurs. Burnley are still fuming with the penalty decision, though they don’t really have a case. The law is an ass; the referee is not. You can understand their frustration, though, especially as they were defending with such serenity.

GOAL! Tottenham 1-0 Burnley (Kane 45+8 pen)

Harry Kane scores! He dragged the penalty into the bottom-left corner, with Pope choosing not to dive. I doubt he’d have saved it anyway; it was perfectly placed.

PENALTY GIVEN! I don’t think anybody appealed, but laws is laws and Barnes did have his arms in an unnatural position.

45+6 min: Kevin Friend is going to the monitor, so this will probably be a penalty to Spurs.

The incident took place before Kane’s chance. Sanchez flicked the ball against the outstretched arm of Ashley Barnes, and it’s still being checked by VAR. The only thing that might save Barnes is how close he was to Sanchez.

VAR check for a Spurs penalty! This will be given I think.

45+4 min: Chance for Kane! Spurs should have taken the lead on the stroke of half-time. Moura got round the back on the right and cut the ball back to Kane, who swept it wide of the near post from 10 yards.

45 min Four minutes of added time. Kane loses McNeil, 25 yards from goal, but cracks his shot wide.

43 min This match has taken an unexpected turn. Spurs have lost their way and Burnley, who barely had a kick in the first 15-20 minutes, are starting to enjoy themselves.

40 min Spurs started well but haven’t threatened since around the 18th minute. Antonio Conte will be preparing the

chainsaw
hairdryer.

39 min “The Cleese thing has grown infirm with age and deserves to be retired with dignity,” says Charles Antaki. “As a replacement how about, ‘It’s not the hubris; I can stand the hubris; it’s the nemesis’. Applicable to every penalty kick, substitution, game and indeed season.”

It rolls off the tongue, so why not.

37 min Cornet is being treated for a cut after being caught accidentally by Sanchez. He’s having his head bandaged but should be okay to continue.

35 min “There is no free will, no one is in charge or their own destiny or master of their own domain,” says Francis Mead. “So we should say, ‘Burnley will stay up or go down according to the whims of a blind, purposeless and wholly deterministic universe.’”

34 min The crowd are started to get a bit frustrated. Burnley have defended well – Spurs, for all their possession and promise, haven’t had many clear chances.

33 min Moura, possibly unsighted, mistimes a header from Dier’s inswinging cross. It wasn’t much of a chance.

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