Jimmy Kimmel Thinks Donald Trump Is Going Directly to Jail


Jimmy Kimmel is very confident that Donald Trump will soon find himself in the slammer. Days after roasting Trump for his reported attempt to censor Jimmy Kimmel Live! while he was in office, Kimmel laid into the former president once again for protesting his innocence before speaking at this year’s Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC). 

“In Washington, the fascist and the furious have gathered to praise their lord and savior, Donald Trump, at the annual CPAC convention,” said Kimmel at the top of his Thursday-night monologue. The comedian explained that Trump is set to speak at the conference on Saturday, and that the ex-president has already begun to gin up his base and stoke conspiracy theories on social media platforms like Truth Social. “The Tandalorian was very fired up today,” quipped Kimmel. “He wrote in all caps, ‘They’re not coming for me. They’re coming for you. I’m just in their way.’”

The comedian then directly addressed Trump, who former New York prosecutor Mark Pomerantz wrote in his resignation letter last year is “guilty of numerous felony violations” (Trump is currently being investigated by the Department of Justice). “No, they’re coming for you,” said Kimmel. “When you get arrested, none of the rest of us are going to prison with you. You’re gonna be in there, begging for hair spray alone.”

Kimmel then turned his attention to CPAC, which he described as a conference comprised of “every low-rent radio host and podcast racist with a dye job and a fleece vest.”

“Remember the first season of American Idol, when the losers would just line up and be mowed down by Simon Cowell?” asked Kimmel. “It’s like that, but without Simon Cowell.”  

Kimmel also had some smoke for Trump’s eldest son, Donald Trump Jr., who’s speaking at CPAC on Friday. Kimmel roasted “DJ TJ” by overlaying a game of Fruit Ninja on a video of Jr. gesticulating as he tore into former Speaker of the House Paul Ryan for not attending the Republican National Convention if Trump is the nominee.

Kimmel then played a clip of former vice president Mike Pence carefully avoiding endorsing Donald Trump for president in an interview with CBS News. “Has anyone dodged more questions than Mike Pence?” asked Kimmel. “This man was Donald Trump’s vice president, and he wouldn’t vote for him. You realize how unusual that is? It’s like if macaroni said goodbye to cheese.” 


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